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Jackpot! Characters from Who-The-Fuck-Knows
This girl is...*checks database* Valkyrie from a *checks google* 1989 namco arcade game. Oh boy.
Mother fucking Dante from Devil May Cry.
No, I'm here because I wanted to hire you.
Well, lady, I try my best to give priority to jobs from hotties like you. But if it's the pure, chaste Valkyrie herself, that's another story.
Any work you'd give me has gotta be bad news.
You know who I am?
Someone has to.
Well, yeah. Down in the demon world, you've pretty much been blacklisted.
You should really put on a less flashy outfit while you're on Earth, by the way.
But I always wear this.
Plus, who's that guy behind you? He'd give anyone the creeps.
Behind me?
Hey, it's that vampire guy from Darkstalkers! That...guy...uh
I thought you usually had that pudgy green guy with you, lady.
Demitri! Demitri Maximoff?!
First a warrior from heaven, and now a vampire of the night, huh.
You guys going to a fancy ball or something? Shame I wasn't invited.
So, are you the one they call Dante? The legendary son of Sparda?
And you...Valkyrie, the holy fighter. Why are you here?
Surely you must know what is happening in the demon world right now.
That, and how the fallout is threatening to extend into the human world.
......
Morrigan, that girl from Marvel vs. Capcom!
What about you, Demitri? Why did you come here?
I know little of the human world. I came to hire a guide.
For some reason, Morrigan sent both lords of their domains to Dante. Weird.
A cross between human and demon blood-the son of the Betrayer.
Dante's dad, Sparda, sealed hell for Earth. Hell didn't like that much.
An astonishing coincidence! Perhaps we were fated to meet here, like this.
......(Damn you, Morrigan...)
What do you people want from me, anyway?
I want you to come with me to a certain place.
Someplace that I think you would be interested in as well, Demitri.
What?
The guy who's ass we kicked earlier? He's a wuss.
I see.
(Head of the Dohma family? This is starting to get real serious!)
Okay, so where do you want me to go?
I'm going to Marvel Land to deal with a problem in the human world?
I knew I had a bad feeling about this.
Now we're at a weird clock underground place with magic circle in the middle.
So, here we are. The pyramid built by the evil Zouna ages ago.
Dante is trying his damn hardest to pretend people know everything about Valkyrie. Also, pyramids were built by not-humans, blah blah blah
We're pretty deep inside by this point, aren't we? I don't like it much.
Indeed. The forces I feel disturb me. And what about this magic circle, Valkyrie?
It appears to be safe for now, but it is extremely unstable nonetheless.
This chamber used to be connected to another world. Even today, monsters still appear from this room now and again.
Sure, I see a few of them here now.
What about those treasure chests?
They somehow found their way here as well, just like these creatures. None of this was here when I visited just a little while earlier.
What? Well, I suppose so.
Hah. Shameless. So much for the son of the Legendary Dark Knight, eh?
Sparda, not Batman.
Hey, a good rep's nice and all, but I need money if I wanna stay alive.
Gotta be able to afford some pizza for dinner, y'know.
Besides, I kinda got a lady in my life I owe a bunch of cash to.
In that case, let's defeat these monsters and procure the chests for Dante.
Oh, brother.
Yeah, so Demitri and Dante are a team. Weird combo. Also, our mission currently is to just open all the chests. You don't HAVE to kill the enemies, but in hindsight I should've.
Small note, getting hit gives 5 XP so Defend really costs 15 XP.
Opening the chests was actually a trap!
Ma'am, who the hell are you
You wield a different power from ours. Are you a demon?
I want to know who you are before I am comfortable welcoming you.
Ah, a native! Hmm, your power is certainly impressive.
You may call me Reimsianne La Vaes.
Well, hey, devil queen. Those other guys your henchmen?
Other guys? Why did these strangers come here with me?
So this Dante is soon after Devil May Cry 3 if he's referencing the tower and Lady.
Riemsianne...That was your name, yes?
What are you -no, how did you even get here?
Toma. I see the Heritors of the Holy Swords are after me yet again.
Apparently all 3 people are from...*checks google* Shining Force EXA on the ps2? The fuck is that? And why is the game assuming we played that? Goddamnit.
Hey, uh, Cyrille? I'm glad we tracked her down in time...but where are we?
Forget about that, Toma. You know what we have to do here before anything else.
Yeah, yeah. Man, I hate when you're so bossy like that. It makes me wanna--
I can hear you, Toma!
Heh. Enough of this. I will envelop all of you in the hellfire of purgatory.
And you, Toma and Cyrille. Soon, bot of your precious Holy Swords will be mine!
I'm never giving you the Shining Force!
I said, they will be mine! Hee hee! Then I'll rule this world's demons, too.
What business do you have, butting in here with that ridiculous nonsense!?
I'd prefer if you villains wouldn't make it any worse. I have a realm of my own to protect. Fight us, and we will rend you into bones!
What?!
GHOSTNGOBLINS THEME
Huh?! Who're you?!
You are Arthur, yes? The Knight of Silver?
Indeed. It has been quite a while, Valkyrie.
Hey, it's Arthur! Another character from Marvel vs. Capcom 3. And also Ghost N Goblins or something. Imagine meeting you here, of all places! Color me very surprised!
Apparently they met before in the previous game, Namco vs. Capcom. Great.
And I remember some of you others, too. This warping of dimensions is so tiring.
Arthur? Ah, yes. From that land of ghosts and goblins.
Well, wonderful! How nice to have one of the original Devil Hunters with us.
Oh? A fellow knight? Your power seems familiar to me....Hmm?
Sparda? No. Wait...you must be!
Pretty sharp, I see. Yep, I'm his son, Dante.
Pfft! I don't know who half of you are, but I'll kill you all the same!
Agreed.
Toma! Cyrille! Please, we need your help!
Well, yes, but...we hardly even know who you are.
Who cares, Cyrille? They don't look evil or anything to me.
What are you two little children prattling on about?
That's what I like to hear, lad! You are safe in trusting me, I assure you.
...I can't tell who's helping less.
He's got his weird traits, yeah, but I think he's a good guy deep down.
See, Cyrille? We're among friends here.
"A son of a demon, vampire, weird holy lady, and a flasher. No biggy!"
Well, if that's what you think, Toma, then okay.
Because I know when I can trust someone, unlike you, apparently!
Technically we just have to kill the boss, but free items+levels on the grunts so eh.
Shining Force Spam
Arthur
Getting naked is his signature move?
Valkyrie's theme
Valkyrie
Her game must be really weird if that's her signature move.
Devils Never Cry
Devil May Stalk Spam
And here's the first super I did, because I could.
Demitri bites continuously while Dante spams with his guns.
Then, Uppercut slash by Dante into devil transformation into lightning spam.
Demitri does a boring fighting game combo
Dante uses his two guns to fire Jackpot
One of the more boring Supers, actually. Probably because it's two completely unrelated series.
If I could obtain the power strewn across all of these worlds, then perhaps...
Riemsianne! I thought you were after the Shining Force!
Listen, girl, I don't want you getting any funny ideas, now.
Funny ideas? Hee hee! You mean like this?
Oh no! Are people going to be sucked into another dimension?! Again?! For the third time?!
SHOCKING
Geh. Any ideas, Demitri?
This force...It's the same as when Riemsianne first showed up.
So you think they all went back to where they came from?
I can only hope so.
I need to stay here and fully investigate this.
Hmph. I'm going back to my castle. I see no point being further involved here.
Hahahaha.
Sit your ass back down, Demitri. You're suffering alongside me.
*Demitri disappears*
That's nobility for you. No backbone whatsoever.
Anyway, Valkyrie, I think I'm gonna head back to my office.
*Dante vanishes*
Marvel Land's in trouble, demons are invading from another realm,
And now Arthur's here, too. Why does stability have to be so elusive for us?
Characters Introduced
Arthur (Ghost N Goblins)
Demitri Maximoff (Darkstalkers)
Cyrille (Shining Force EXA)
Toma (Shining Force EXA)
Dante (Devil May Cry)
Valkyrie (Legend of Valkyrie)
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