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NOTE: CLICK THE WEBM LINKS TO SEE THEM, THEY DON'T DISPLAY WELL ON THE SSLP TEST POST!
(available on Steam! I... I promise that's there for a reason!)
https://zippy.gfycat.com/IncompatibleSmartGyrfalcon.webm
TECHNOBABYLON
Babylon was a huge big deal of a city in Mesopotamia. It stomped all over the ancient Middle East, and was generally known as a huge, cosmopolitan place. It also has kind of a bad reputation on account of its portrayal in the Hebrew and Christian holy books. So, when you hear Babylon, the general tenor should be "massive city, also probably a metaphor or something."
https://zippy.gfycat.com/AridQualifiedKingbird.webm
(The studio so nice, they get a logo twice!)
So we actually get a lot from this establishing shot.
This is clearly a futuristic city (you can tell by the car and sign, and by the general green/blue glow), but not all is right. There's vandalism, and, I think we can all agree, those three head mole guys are AMAZING.
And in the heart of this decaying metropolis, nobody knows pain quite like this Lands End Model.
There are a steady stream of just hilariously dumb looking "urban punk" subtypes trekking by, and if the screen wasn't totally covered by text blocks I'd have shown them all off. Suffice it to say they're all into "sea punk" or "ultra wave" or whatever futuristic niche music markets you can imagine.
Hahaha look at that TOPKNOT. Anyway, using our techno-shamanistic fetish, we summon a floating screen into view. Darn altered reality fiends! 
I'm still not sure if this guy is a protagonist or antagonist, but talking to Siri a shadowy information broker isn't getting him many points.
1) He's somehow even whiter zoomed in. It's like a bureaucrat and a ska band had a kid.
2) Seeing as this is the intro, expect LOTS of vagueity. Vagueness? Vagueosity?
- You're sure this is the one?
- I'm positive. Latha Sesame. Goes by 'Mandala' in the Trance.
Latha is an Indian name. Sesame is an Indian crop! Mandala is a ritual symbol used in Indian religion - it represents the cosmos. You should be getting a theme here. Altogether, this is to India as Pierre LaFou, who goes by XHonh_honh_honhX, is to France.
- There's a big gap in the records, and it's shaped exactly like her. . A big, nerd-shaped hole.
- I thought you said he put a lot of effort into it?
Yaaaay the pronoun game! Wooooo!
- They've been hiding her activity, but weren't covering up their own work very well.
Which seems like it'd be important? Eh, whatever.
- If they did, then I -
Whitebread! Are you ok?
- How are the headaches?
- Won't be a problem for much longer.
- You understand the plan?
- Don't worry, I know exactly what I'm doing.
https://zippy.gfycat.com/RequiredGlaringElephantseal.webm
Dum dum DUMMMMM
And with that, it's PRETTY likely that honkey-tonk here is off the protagonist list. But soft, what adventures await us further on?
In case you forgot what game this is after that intro.
So, me at around 3:30 PM on a Friday?
Now, for my favorite thing:
https://fat.gfycat.com/SmoggyHatefulCrab.webm
Behold, our heroine! Flying free through a web of alphanumeric characters! I hope I'm not spoiling this too hard for you, but Trance is Internet.
- A world built of abstracts and intellect. Of cat memes and subreddits.
- Of tangible thought, where every part has been crafted by an individual soul. many of whom have diabetes and unpleasant opinions about race and gender!
- It's the purest form of contact a person can have, mind to mind. It's the pinnacle of human achievement. Way better than kissin'. I assume.
- Some might say that achievement in the physical world is somehow more meaningful. But it isn't, DAD. And SOCIAL WORKER. And GUIDANCE COUNSELOR.
- To them, I say, 'Join the future, or be surpassed by it'.
We're gonna have to hear the real world referred to condescendingly as "meatspace", aren't we. Oh, boy.
- Within the Trance, we are millions of minds, as one.
- But even as far as we've come, there's still one serious flaw...
- It's reliance on the 'real world' as its backbone...
uh.
https://fat.gfycat.com/WellgroomedQualifiedHamadryad.webm
Ha ha no more lurking for you. Also notice the seventeen "ERROR" screens. At least that's a realistic depiction of how browsers throw errors!
Ok, so here's my #1 issue with Technobabylon. I'm pretty solidly in the nerd camp. I, for instance, make Let's Play videos. I have my subreddits and I play online games and etc. etc.
I would never, ever speak of the internet in these glowing terms. In fact, I'd say we've specifically learned that this stuff is NOT true. The internet is neat and everything, it lets me find an audience for my weird hobbies, but I don't think that you and I, fair goons, have "the most intimate connection known to man" or whatever.
And the crazy thing is, I'm PRETTY sure the game sort of expects us to agree with Mandala here, that the internet is just so great and the only problem in her life is that she can't be on it all the time.
I THINK? But, well, watch on.
I guess blue is "connected", red is "error", and green is "offline mode".
Because I'm mean, I picked her doofiest talking face.
- It's not like there's anything to be afraid of out there...
- Let's get this over with.
Not just yet! Let's see what our on-line options are:
We have player control for the first time now! Iiiiit's pretty much limited to walkin' and lookin' at our menu/inventory bar at the bottom.
Our newsfeed is empty, because we can't connect. Lousy Time Warner!
Same goes for trying to get sports or weather information.
Chishiki is Japanese for "information"
Mail is a bit more forthcoming:
NEWTON SUPPORT
FROM:
City of Newton
RECEIVED:
10 July 2087
SUBJECT:
Circumstances...
--------------------
Dear Ms. Sesame,
This message is to remind you that you have not been attending your scheduled employment meetings. If you do not inform us of absences, you risk losing housing support from the city. You have been receiving city support benefit for <711> days, and we hope that you will be able to improve your circumstances soon.
Hahaha we're such an abject failure.
FORGET EMPLOYMENT, MY CLAN NEEDS ME!
BARON M. O'SHEA
FROM:
LtCol o'Shea
RECEIVED:
09 July 2087
SUBJECT:
A proposal...
---------------------
Dear Sir/Miss, my name is MARCUS o'SHEA. I am the CHIEF FINANCIER for the Oklahoma General MARTIN CARTER. His recent death at the hands of a rival warlord has left me with ONE HUNDRED and FIFTY THOUSAND (Ø150000000) Quanta of his finance. If you will allow me to transfer through your bank accounts, I can offer to share...
We're saved! No work forever!
Also, har har in this topsy turvey future Oklahoma is home to roving warlords.
Actually, wait, it might be like that now. Can some OK goon confirm/deny?
RUTE, T.I.
FROM:
Rute, T
RECEIVED:
09 July, 2087
SUBJECT:
Let's MEet [sic] up!
------------------------
Hey, Dala! :3
Seems like we haven't seen you in YEARS (>.<
No idea if you heard, but there's a big game coming up at the Rotunda. If you're up for leaving your apartment, we can probably get you a place on the team xoxo - T
No, of course we don't play any filthy meatspace sports, IRL, n00b. We used to play some kind of competitive game, but then we just dissolved away from that and all human contact.
I want to mention something at the outset, here. The game goes to some lengths to show us that Mandala doesn't have agoraphobia, or bipolar depression, or some psychological trigger that makes the outside world super scary or anything. She just loves being lazy on Trance just, just so much. More than any person, or activity, or hobby.
And, again, I think we're supposed to sympathize?
EXS PHARMA
FROM:
EXS Pharma
RECEIVED:
09 July 2087
SUBJECT:
amazing deals on chem
-------------------------
do you want the extra interfface speedw ithout the extra cost? X-TRA SPEED WITH X-TRA PHARM!1! OPEN ATTACED IMAG FOR ODER INFO!!!
So this one is a little different, in that it has an attachment that's wigglin' around, like...
So.
It really says something about our social presence that we are only getting two SPAM EMAILS a day. There's no way these are the creme of the crop that made it through our filter, either. That last one has an attachment and is garbage AND mentions pharmaceuticals, so apparently filters have only gotten dumber on Trance.
Also, because we're dumb, let's download it! (this is required for progression. No, really.)
https://zippy.gfycat.com/HelpfulHeartyApisdorsatalaboriosa.webm
And there it is, just wigglin' around in our personal space. Goodness only knows what it's supposed to do.
Toxik Sigmaa
FROM:
ToxiK Sigmaa
RECEIVED:
04 JULY 2087
SUBJECT:
Grow guide...
-----------------------------
Yo, Dala! Good hearing from you, though I know really it means you want something :P Basically yes, the batch of blue wetware you got is cracked, so you can grow it yourself, just don't Grey Goo your place! It needs a few things:
1) Water, since that's what makes up 99% of it.
2) Nutrition, it's an organism after all...
3) Heat, in the normal stuff it'd cause it to break down, but this blend is activated instead.
And that's all the intro we'll get to one of the most absurd game mechanics. ONE OF, but it's still pretty bad. We'll talk more about this when the time comes. Just know we're growing something "cracked" (illegal), and it's alive. 
Grey Goo references a nightmare sci-fi scenario, wherein nanomachines are created that can convert any other matter into nanomachines, and so consume the entire world, turning it into "grey goo".
Also note for most objects in the real world, and some things in cyberspace, we can right- click to look...
...and left-click to interact. Wait, why don't we want to store that?
- Not unless I want to wake up in some factory in China in ten years.
So, that's something, I guess. Instead of bricking your computer, you can now be hypnotized and ENSLAVED FOR LIFE.
H..hooray for the trance?
Alright, alright.
Nothing for it.
We're going to have to face.... IRL
https://fat.gfycat.com/SnarlingComposedKoalabear.webm
Well, at least they created a character we can really connect to, goons. Mandala is apparently a socially awkward shut-in who spends all of her time on future Second Life. Speaking of, I assume this is an avatar. What does she look like...
I cannot WAIT. JOIN ME, as I continue to explore the world of Technobabylon, NEXT TIME!