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#1. Build-A-Dad

In this first episode, I've taken the liberty of making a dad for your enjoyment, plus a few dialogue decisions. Fear not, dad fans -- at the end of this update, you can vote on a new dad and our route.

Dad Tip #18: Always carry a pocket knife.



Title drop...



"zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..."

"Dad."

"zzzzzzzzzz..."

"DAD! Wake up!"





"Morning, Manda Panda."

"Yikes, Dad breath. Go brush your teeth."



Look at this handsome mug!



"Did you finish packing last night?"



Searching around the room, it looks like I did a pretty good job. Every box is sealed except for one.

"Wait, straggler."

"What's in it?"

Looking into the box, I see a bunch of old photos in little photo albums.

"Whoa, I haven't seen these in years..."



"That's the coolest baby I've ever seen."



"The only way your mother and I could get you to stop crying was to put the sunglasses on you. But whenever we tried to take them off, you'd start crying again. You spent the first two years of your life with sunglasses on."

"Nice."



There are so many little variations on Amanda's expressions that it's ridiculous.

"Oh my god that dragon costume."

"You couldn't decide between being a princess or a dragon, so you went with both. Princess Dragon."

"Why do I remember crying in that dragon costume?"

"You saw yourself in the mirror and realized you were afraid of dragons. Seeing yourself inside the dragon's mouth was a realization of your greatest fear, I think."

"Right. Yup. Definitely repressed that memory."



"Daaaaad..."

"I believe you named that plush horse "Sir Horsington the Brave"

"I don't think that was his--"

Amanda lunges for the photo, but I quickly snatch it away and hold it above her head with my superior Dad arms.

"Nice try, but this is important blackmail for later down the road."

"Go ahead and try me, I've seen pictures of you in your Ska band."

"Ouch, kid.

"The Skammunist Manifesto had a chance back in the day."

I look off into the distance and reminisce about that rad horn section.



"No, Dad, that's Emma R.! I didn't meet Emma P. until high school."

"Honey I promise you, wholeheartedly, that I will never stop mixing those two up."

"Dad, Emma R.'s been my best friend since I was seven. Give it like, a little bit of effort."

"Oh right! Emma P. was the one who..."



"Lighter fluid, tennis ball, tennis racket. Right?"

"Dad, that was you."

"Oh right, I was a wild child."

"I was six when you did it."

"Okay, Amanda. I Wasn't aiming for the police station. It just happened that there was a police station in the vicinity of where I wanted to hit a flaming tennis ball."

"Yeah, I remember you explaining that to the police."

"They didn't believe me either."

"Anyway, I gotta show this to Emma R. later. She'll get a kick out of it."



"Yeah, and it got us a $20 gift card to McFridayz.

"And then you got food poisoning from the Cheezy Toztada Blastz!"

"I think you mean food poizoning. You know, with a Z?"

"Dad."

"Still can't drive past McFridayz without gagging.

"Still proud of you, though."

Amanda reaches deep down into the box and pulls out one last photo.



I finally decide to break the silence.





"We got into a car accident right there in the hospital parking lot. It wasn't anything big, just a fender bender. But of course I was freaking out. And the little old lady who crashed into us was freaking out. And I didn't know what to do.

"But your mother. Oh man.

"She holds my hand, looks me directly in the eyes -- the calmest I've ever seen her, she says... 'It's okay. It's all gonna be okay.'

"..."

"...she was right, you know."

I stare at the picture for longer. Maybe too long.

I miss her.

I can't even imagine what it must be like for Amanda.

She pats me on the back.



Voting!

You've got a day to pitch a rough, brief description of your ideal dad, or to support someone else's! Of course, sticking with Prester John is an option, too. I'll use the DADBUILDER9000 to approximate the thread's dadbod.

Now, there are simply way too many choices for us to vote on every single one. For less important decisions, we're going to vote on a policy. Is our first dad:

A. Honest and frank, even a little stern?
B. A people pleaser who just wants to have fun?
C. A bit of a rebel?

Now, about our first dad's family.

D. Is Amanda our adopted daughter?
E. Or is she our biological daughter?

Lastly:

F. Is her mother out of the picture?
G. Or is her other father gone?