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Ladies and gentlemen of the Let's Play subforum, It's time to kick it oldschool.



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This is the 1972 arcade game Pong, which is quite possibly older than your parents. It features a cataclysmic battle for the ages, between the heroic and righteous right paddle, and the nefarious and cruel despot known only as left paddle. The two sides clash, hurling forth a mighty boulder at one another, until it fails to be stopped by their rival, wreaking havoc on the unseen innocents lurking just offscreen. Above the battlefield, either side of the demarcation 'twixt good and evil, hover the omniscient keepers of the score, their bold numerals keeping a clear account of the course of the conflict. When the eleventh seal is broken on one side or the other, the terrible clash of great powers is at an end, and the victor alone remains to look across the battlefield.

Behold!



The battle commences, and the bold and brave right paddle is in trouble! Unless it can get down swiftly enough...



Oh no! The worst has happened! Look at left paddle, smug and self-satisfied, crowing at our defeat. Hideous, unsportsmanlike and vile. We must gird our loins, redouble our strength, and fend off the next assault. We shall prevail!



Disaster upon disaster! You can almost hear the vile laughter of left paddle, mocking our feeble efforts. So many have fallen due to our failure, so much has been lost. Can we find it within ourselves to carry on? Is there any hope for all that is good and true left in this cruel, cruel world?



Yes! A glimmer, a flicker of a chance! A foothold, a step upon the path to redemption. We must build upon it, my friends. Right paddle isn't out of the woods yet!



Parity! Our brave right paddle has dug himself out of the pit of despair, and is now on the offensive. Let's see how left paddle likes a taste of his own bitter medicine!



Oh, sweet victory, how divine is thy nectar and ambrosia! At last, at long last, we pull ahead of the vile and conniving left paddle, and continue our relentless assault! Have at thee, sinister one!



Truly, we are the masters of our own fate now! As great an advantage as fell left paddle ever held over us, our losses are avenged twofold! Onwards!



Ever greater deeds do we accomplish! An unprecedented three-point lead for right paddle and all right-thinking peoples. Our ascent continues!



Are you watching, left paddle?! Do you see what has become of your wicked ways? The magnificent right pBeholdmy addle stands more than halfway to glory!



Hah! Our might is unparalleled! Are you even still trying, left paddle? Your reticence sickens me, sickens us all. The ultimate triumph is within our grasp!



Behold our undeniable mastery! We are invincible! We are unstoppable! With right paddle at our head, nothing can stop us now! Nothing could possibly so much as delay our triumph!



Wait, what? What witchery is this? Right paddle was winning, how are you getting points on the board, vile miscreant of the leftside path? Wait just one moment...



Oh my, something is wrong here, something is very, very wrong. Right paddle, where art thou? He's gaining on us, left paddle is gaining on us!



Right paddle, right paddle, why have you forsaken us? You were supposed to be the chosen one, bringing victory to the game, not losing it!



Hmm, perhaps we, er, overreacted a little. our dextrous champion is but a couple of points from success, after all...



Bah! That was no overreaction! Our would-be colossus has feet of clay! Has left paddle worked some diabolical scheme?



Alas and alack! We are as near our nemesis as we are to success! Can anything pull our besmirched, brooding champion out of this funk, this veritable slough of despond?



So close to paradise that we can aught but touch it! Just a little more, o good, sweet right paddle! One last act, one last step towards the light, that's all we ask!



Right paddle, no! Don't give in to the sadness! Come on, right paddle, you have to score a point, you have to!



Is... is it over? It is! Right paddle has ascended! Left paddle has been banished, never to return! Let the shouts of jubilation ring out, for this is our victory!