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14: Bards Of A Feather
Happily knowing nothing about Matthew's first chapter...
...and accompanied by much, much, much more trustworthy associates...
Still don't know what you are.
Of course you are!
Guy is so good. There's a reason Hector is so universally beloved, and it's not just the fact that he has good stats.
Anyway, that's enough dilly-dallying before the battle, let us be
off...?!?!
is that
...
Ｏｈ ｍｙ ｇｏｄ．
Kent comes with nothing in his inventory, save for a license to break the game. There is a reason they never, ever give you two dancers!
(Or I guess they do in Heroes but then they make them immune to each other, and also to fun? Don't look at me I don't play heroes.)
It doesn't help that both bards actually have con scores and can reliably rescue many of our units.
Kent and Heath can, within the space of a single turn, deliver a unit to any open tile on the map. It's like that stupid old "peasant railgun" idea, except it actually works. Move one bard, dance for him, move two tiles and dance, move two tiles and dance...
In all honesty, I probably won't be bringing Kent on most maps because I'm too lazy and bad to make full use of two dancers.
Mazinger F is still a super robot. She comes with an emblem lance and vulnerary.
And then, we have Matthew's crew.
The man himself is... not great. 3 speed, 1 def. And 5 con is not enough for an axe user.
But he does come with the one axe he can swing without penalty! But it's really weak. 2 mt, to be precise.
Next, standing in for, I believe, Lowen, we have -
what have I done to deserve this, game?!
Flux is shit, too. He does come with two of them, presumably because they're not buyable for a while. I may find a better use, though...
Rath is much as we left him,
and comes with a second swordreaver.
Wil is standing in for Bartre. He is Bad.
For some reason he comes with two unbreakable spears, the lightest of which weighs him down by eight points.
I... do not want to train another soldier if I can help it.
But speaking of Bartre!
Bartre is our Jeigan, and he is kinda sorta actually really good!
And then, last and least,
there's Nino.
What? "Least" as in "fucking tiny", have you seen that con?
Nino's stats are actually quite good! If her growths hold up, she will be an excellent unit, and again, the iron lance is only 4 wt so she'll still be at 6 speed with it.
She needs to get rid of this one immediately, though.
Flux sux, gimme those bux.
And now, Bartre is just in range to hit the armoury and buy one (1) iron lance. Wyvern lords with 6 move will take some getting used to...
Oh yeah, and I didn't look at the enemies before. Zagan is... I forget, what even is he in vanilla? I don't care.
This is obnoxious but mostly harmless.
Let's kill it. Swordreaver, ho!
And Florina is just out of range, so...
Hello, little man.
And now, good bye!
It's basically a rocket punch, it's just a spear instead.
The wyvern doubles Guy, but he tanks the hits without too much of an issue (is a sentence no one has ever written before).
He's close, but hanging on!
NO DAMAG. Bartre's wyvern is feeling a bit blue.
Ye.
And with a little bardin' help,
Guy gets more beef!
And then I had Bartre carry him over the mountains since he was going there anyway.
Wil is awful so he went and did things you don't need stats for.
The urge to slap this on Nino immediately is strong. But I'm not entirely sure she needs it. Guy could use it, too...
And if you don't, you can always run off with a bunch of protagonists or something.
Wait, what?
This peg actually scratched Florina's paint.
And now!
Bards!
And levels.
And now, bards down here! All in the space of a turn.
Flux is so bad. Legault is so bad. I hate this.
Huh, he went for the bards. Well, we're not having any of that!
Get Ninoed! ...FE7 doesn't have the femalier sprite, does it...
And now,
We do it again.
And that puts us in pretty good position to take on the boss, too.
For all his speed issues, Guy is incredibly tanky. He's tied with Florina. Who is a 17/1 promoted unit.
Even the brigand doubles him, but even the brigand doesn't damage him.
Finally...
I'll take more bulk on an un-bulky unit.
I'll take more bulk on a bulky one, too!
...would have liked to see some speed somewhere, though...
Well, the chapter ended and a cutscene started, so I hope so! Be a shame if we left some exp un-killed.
Florina is so good. So good!
I do not believe it.
"Until my keys run out, at any rate."
Things no one has ever said to Bartre...
I think this is going quite well!
Oh, I bet you say that to all the immortal chaos birds.
I did indeed, Florina. I expect great things from you.
Next on Ninian's Bizarre Randomizer:
Say, there's something familiar about this kid...