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Manager we have more footage for you! This time we'd like to claim credit for removing the weird interference from before, but... there wasn't any to remove! We're still not sure why and are looking in to possible reasons for it. Feel free to view at your discretion, it holds some rather... interesting information on the agent in question. Let us know if you'd like us to bring him in for questioning.
: Ahaha, so this machine wasn't a tall tale. A toast to memories.
: A toast to birds.
: A toast to punishment.
: A toast to judgement.
: A toashhht.. a toahst to... fuck you big bird.
: Found you at last. Thought you could get away from me huh?
: Ahoy an' greetin' capshan! Con... congrashulations on your promoshun!
: A toasht to promo... promoshuns for thesh lovely capshun of discplinsh!
: Flattery won't save your ass from a beating. You're coming with me for a little talk.
: Ahsh... wellsh, I can'sh really shay I'm surprished. Capshun's poshition afforded you a look at footashge of my dashterdly pshlans.
: Figured I'd take a look to see who did it so I could mete out my first proper disciplinary action as captain. Who better than the punk who stole our lunch?
: Yesh yesh, sho shorry capshun. Here you goooo, I cleanshed it for you as thasnks. Nishe shtew, my complimensht to the chef.
: If you think returning my thermos now is going to make things easier, you got another thing coming. You're coming with me, now move your ass or I'll move it for you.
: Shure thing capshun. Here, have a drinshk to celebrashe your promoshun!
: Seriously? You think I'm going to drop this with the offering of a drink? Hell no, I even promised that pompous idiot a shot at you when he begged me for it. I ain't losing a chance to make him owe me one. *grabs the offered beer and crushes it, tossing it down to the ground*
: Now get moving or you'll end up like the can.
: Sho you manashed to connect wish Boksi? Exshellant! My nefarious plansh are working! Thank you capshun, you havsh turned my day right around. Taksh me away, I have no regretsh!
: Huh, I was expecting more resistance. At least you realize there's no escape- wait.
: What the hell? How do nefarious plans relate to me getting along with that upper-crust prick?
: Itsh simple really. Justish, punishment, judgshment, dishipline... none of these shings bring people together. Ish dashterdly, nefarioush thingsh that unite peoplsh! Shomething that everyone agreesh ish just the worst! Something that allowsh them to share sholidarity! Overcome boundriesh! But doesn'tsh hurtsh them irrevershibly...
: Shit, how many beers have you had to get you babbling like a lunatic? Gonna have to check you in for an evaluation after your disciplinary session...
: Jusht enough to compleshe my nefarious plansh. Look, a three headed monkshey!
: A three headed monkey? Where?
: *nefarious sounding noise intensifies*
Later that night
: The vending machine is out of beer...? Aw man...