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This update is either going to be hilariously short or obnoxiously long and there is no in-between. I guess we'll play it by ear!
A fine day to ye, Ginger. An' a fine day it is for a spot o' work, wouldn't ye agree? This time 'round, it seems some eager buccaneers scampered aboard a local merchantman an' made off with a shipment o' muskets.
Now, seein' as it ain't lawful to cloy from a Lominsan vessel to begin with, the Yellowjackets fell upon them daft coves afore their boots was even dry. Aye, they caught the pirates right there on the docks, but the stolen boomsticks was nowhere to be found--fenced in a longboat deal, I'm thinkin'. That's when our guild was officially contracted to retrieve the goods. ...Which weren't really needful, since the code would have had us on the job, anyway. "Ye don't bite the purses o' yer fellow Lominsans," an' all that.
So, this's yer assignment, me natty lass: find out where them weapons went, an' bite that shipment back. Seein' as the cutters as hit that merchantman are already rottin' in irons, ye needn't rush in with yer stabbers a-stabbin'. I want this job handled quick an' quiet, an' I've the perfect partner to show ye how it's done.
It's the redheaded miqo'te from the last rogue update!
This here's V'kebbe the Stray. Ain't no other rogue what can match her in the arts o' skulkin'.
You'd think a catgirl that wears green and has fiery orange hair would stick out a little.
...A pleasure.
...There some problem, V'kebbe? Ye seem a bit out o' sorts.
I'm bloody starvin'. I had one o' them finger sandwiches set aside--ye know, those egg-filled tasties they make at the Bismarck--but when I got back from me work, it was bloody gone...
(Uh-oh. That was V'kebbe's? I'd thought it was Underfoot's...) <cough> Ahem! Well, ye just head out on the job, an' I'll see if I can't turn up that missin' sandwich by the time ye return!
...All right, Jacke.
Ah, one more little detail ye should know: them muskets was meant for the Yellowjackets' armory, so once all is bob, ye can hand the goods to one o' their culls directly.
It's really nice having actual quests and thievery to do. I really like when the class and job quests have an actual purpose that isn't just defending their existence from hollow braggarts. It's just a pity that almost all of them yes, including these very quests fall into the same storytelling pitfalls.
We can start whenever yer ready, Ginger. I've had a colleague keepin' a wattle out for aught that might help us, so I suggest ye have a few whids with her first. Ye'll find her at the Hyaline, posin' as a fishmonger.
One of the buildings in the upper part of Limsa is the Hyaline. I'd try to describe where it is, but given I never showed off its whole layout...
That lass down there-the one stinkin' o' fish an' ocean. Go over an' ask her what the catch o' the day is.
'Ello there, miss. We've carp an' trout, lobster an' shrimp...but I 'ear tell ye've been lookin' for a special breed o' fish--the long, shiny kind what's bark'll put a bloke on 'is arse. We don't sell that kind 'ere, but ye might try them foreign merchants--what was they called again?--ah, the "Traders of Edge." They 'ail from the south sea isles, an' are known for dealin' in all types o' nasty spitters an' cutters.
I should warn ye: these folk ain't ones for questionin' the source o' their merchandise. In fact, they seem more'n 'appy to pay for goods what came from "belowdecks," so to speak. But if yer still keen to get yer 'ands on those rare fish, then ye'd best 'urry--the Edge merchant what's visitin' Limsa is lookin' to load up an' leave the city afore long.
Just 'ow 'e means to transport 'is goods remains a mystery, though. What with all the 'ired blades 'e's got nursin' 'is operation, it makes it 'ard for a girl to get close enough to eyeball the competition, it does! I'll be sure to keep an eye peeled on yer behalf, but it might be as ye can learn a little more from the folk 'round town...
Cass then waves at V'kebbe.
...Traders of Edge, eh? Well, if one o' their merchant's been stayin' in the city, then someone'll know somethin' to point us in the right direction. The trick is to listen without bein' seen. Ye'd be surprised at how culls'll cackle when they think no one else is about. We'll focus on places what see plenty o' traffic. Ye can have the Bismarck, the ferry docks, and East Hawkers' Alley. I'll try me luck at a few other spots, then meet ye in front o' the guild when I'm done. Remember: keep hidden, keep quiet, an' keep yer wattles open.
The Bismarck is the restaurant V'kebbe had ordered a sandwich from earleir. Indeed, you can pretty often find her standing around outside of it waiting for food! It's also the CUL guild in case you ever wanted to learn to make food.
We need to approach Diving Dove while in stealth.
Ugh! The sneer on that customer's face! Does he think I can command the skillet to cook more swiftly just to meet his pressing departure schedule? I don't know how things are done in the south seas, but here in Limsa Lominsa folk appreciate that fine cuisine cannot be rushed!
...Come now, Dove, you must not speak ill of the patrons. Now, what was next on my list? Ah, another finger sandwich for the Dutiful Sisters. Someone there must be rather fond of eggs...
Sounds like Jacke "couldn't find" V'kebbe's sandwich.
The messages in chat reminds me that I never actually bothered with the Make It Rain campaign. I'm not sure I actually missed out on anything though. It ended back in November.
You have quite an eye for quality, sir! We've a splendid range of produce from every corner of Eorzea, but one simply cannot visit Limsa Lominsa without sampling some of the local specialties! Would you care for some freshly squeezed La Noscean orange juice? Or perhaps our famed salt cod is more to your taste...?
(SYSTEM) Gerulf continues to espouse the virtues of his merchandise, but his impassioned urgings appear to have little relevance to your assignment.
Part of me is starting to think I should have a narrator portrait just for system messages. Though 39 updates in is kind of late to add one.
Poor Rerenasu is involved in a lot of "have you seen something" quests.
Curse my sense of duty... Would that I had stayed at the Wench for that extra pint instead of returning early. I didn't ask to see anyone being bribed! And certainly not my relief pilot! I wonder what that merchant was about? Smuggling? Most likely... Should I report this to the Yellowjackets? ...But what if I'm being watched? I could end up facedown in the harbor... What to do, what to do...
And V'kebbe is waiting for us by the guild!
Welcome back, Ginger. I hope yer skulkin' went well. Ye might be an angel o' death with the daggers, dove, but any rogue what shuns the shadows is headed for an early grave. A sneaky mort can nose about without riskin' a scrap, or slip herself into the best position to ambush a mark. Once they've seen ye, though, yer rum fun is done. Hidin' is part concealment an' part distraction, an' ye won't be disappearin' on a cove what already knows yer there.
All right, I'm done prattlin'. What'd ye manage to learn about our musket-buyin' merchant friend? Slippin' coin to a ferry pilot, was he? An' by what ye heard from that chef at the Bismarck, this trader means to hop the twig, an' soon. That matches with me own findin's: he's vacated his rooms at the inn an' paid his dues in full.
Bein' a merchant, we can be sure that he won't be leavin' without his merchandise. So, here's the plan: we wait for him to stack his goods on the pier, then you ghost in an' grabble them firearms. I'm hopin' we can get the job done quiet an' under cover of darkmans, but it never hurts to be prepared for the worst. Sounds like he's got a small army o' sellswords on the payroll...
This duty doesn't take very long at all. It's more a glorified stealth tutorial than anything.
I'll send word to the Yellowjackets, an' have 'em post a cull near Hawkers' Alley. That way ye won't have far to bolt once ye've bitten the goods. The mark should be along any moment, Ginger. Have ye got yer skulkin' boots on?
I've spotted the mark at the end of the pier. Sneak over there an' lighten his load.
It's easy enough. We just have to sneak past the enemies. I'm not sure if it's possible to be caught here, becuase you just have to take things moderately slowly and you can make it to the end without being caught!
Moderately slowly is relative, naturally. Ginger moves as fast as she can while sneaking. These enemies are blind.
You! You are not supposed to be here! I thought I ordered my hirelings to keep this jetty clear!
Hm? ...One...two...three... ...There's one missing.
My crate of muskets! It's gone!
Smug Ginger is the best.
Thief! Stop her, you useless sluggards! What am I paying you for!?
We've no place to run... Time to get yer stabbers out!
The guards drop almost instantly.
Thieves! Scoundrels! A bonus to the one who brings me their hides!
Slink past any other swads in yer way, an' get them goods to the Yellowjackets. I'll lead these culls a merry chase. Meet me in front o' the guild once all is bob!
We just need to drop into stealth and make our way up the pier.
Like before, there's basically no chance of being caught.
Especially if you don't walk right through enemies.
Aye, these are our stolen muskets. The quartermaster will be pleased.
It's as simple as that!
That turned hairy, didn't it, dove? Once ye reached the Yellowjacket, though, the merchant called off his blades. Wise enough to cut his losses, I'll give him that. I'd say we're all done here. Let's head inside an' tell Jacke the bene news.
I heard the sounds o' fightin' comin' from outside, an' now I've whiddled the cause of it. ...I thought we were aimin' for "subtle" on this job.
*fills Jacke in*
That many swads, was there? But ye got the Yellowjackets what they wanted, so all's well that ends well, eh?
Yer on yer way to becomin' a first-class rogue, Ginger. Aye, the job didn't unfold exactly as planned, but do ye see the value o' keepin' out o' sight? Skulkin' might seem slow, but it can save ye time--an' a fair amount o' bleedin'--in the long run.
Ah, speakin' of unexpected developments... I've a bit o' bad news for ye, V'kebbe. I searched high an' low, but it seems some unprincipled cove has yaffled yer sandwich. There were naught but crumbs to be found.
No... My sandwich... It was a Bismarck special... Do ye know how much I was lookin' forward to that meal!? Me belly's about ready to cave in on itself!
'Tis a tragedy o' the highest order, love. An' ye know I can't bear to see me rogues in such distress... So, I gave Underfoot a special assignment--he should be back any moment now... with a freshly made Bismarck special finger sandwich!
Ye did that for me!? Yer not japin' with me, are ye, Jacke!?
This ain't no japin' matter. 'Tis a guildmaster's responsibility to see that all his coves an' morts are at their best for the job.
Ah, Jacke, there ye are! I've got that sandwich ye ordered!
An' didn't the chef give me a wattle-ful when I said we was in a hurry! Maybe next time ye could think twice afore ye yaffle a fellow rogue's sup-- ...Oh, bollocks.
...
*tilts head* ...Jacke. Did you eat my supper?
Now, now, lass, let's not be hasty. There's a fresh new sandwich right here for ye. No harm done, eh?
Ye've cloyed somethin' what belonged to me, Jacke. An' I can't ignore the code...
Ahahaha, aye, the code! We mustn't ignore the code! ...Yer havin' a laugh, aren't ye, lass? ...Lass?
There are some things you just don't do. Stealing lunches is one of them!
Aaargh!
...That might be the swiftest string-up I've ever seen.
A punishment to fit the crime. Take a good long look, Ginger. The code exists to preserve peace in Limsa-to keep the alleys from runnin' red with blood. This city's me home, an' I'll draw daggers on any cove fool enough to threaten that peace.
A pointed lesson. Let's head inside, eh? Yer sandwich'll get cold.
Hey! Do ye mean to leave me here all night!? At least ye gave me a grand view o' the harbor! ...Gods' piss, these ropes are tight!
Don't fuck with people's food, y'all!
And now we find ourselves indebted to the Rogues' Guild. The Rogues' Guild. Hmph, the impropriety of it all. Would that I could see them occupying a cell next to those thieving pirates...
Ow... Them ropes'll leave chafe marks for a bleedin' week. I may've wriggled meself free, but that's the last time I let me belly do the thinkin'... An' just think: V'kebbe strung me up over an egg sandwich. Those coves what well an' truly stomp on the code get it far worse. Keep up yer trainin', lass, an' ye'll soon be handin' out rogue justice yerself.
I'm going to err on the side of keeping this update short. The level 15 quest comes in two parts and it's extremely long. I'd rather keep those two parts together instead of splitting them down the middle.
NEXT TIME: More Ala Mhigan woes